Peter Pan Syndrome

Close your eyes. Think a happy thought. Fly. The idea of never growing up becomes more and more appealing as we, ironically, grow up. We find that the pirates we have to fight are real, we start to see ourselves as "lost boys" trying to survive and we use our imagination to make situations seem better than they are. The truth is, growing up is a state of mind. Of course we physically have to grow up. There is no amount of pixie dust that will keep us young forever. (Although I swear to you I am 25 and that will be the story until I die). Though, if you believe hard enough, you can find your own Peter Pan within yourself. Think about it. As kids, we can't wait to get older. Everything seems so exciting and adventure is in all that we encounter. But as we get older and leave home, we realize...the adventure is a little scarier than we imagined as children. Yet, we set off to new destinations. Second star to the right and straight on till morning! We find Captain Hook exists within the struggles we encounter every day. So we pick up our swords and prepare for battle. Along the way, we find "lost boys", others who have no idea what they want to do with their lives, who don't want to grow up. We find them and we become friends with them because they understand what it is to have to fight every single day. And still somewhere deep inside of us, is that small glimmer of pixie dust letting us know that just because we are in the real world, it doesn't mean we can't still have fun. We get so caught up in our jobs and in our stressful situations and in bills that we forget, it is okay to still play and be carefree sometimes. Honestly, if I didn't have a little Serina still frolicking around somewhere in me, I would go completely insane. Just because you follow Tinkerbell around, doesn't mean you aren't grown up. It just means, you know life is too short to fully let go of child like innocence. Children are the best. I use to work with kids when I taught music. And even though I was the teacher, I learned more from them than they did from me, I'm sure of it. While I would go into class stressed and uptight about things out of my control, they were laughing and running around and making the most of life. I had a child in one of my classes named Cole who is the reason I started thinking up this topic. I was having a bad day and knew payments were coming up and I needed to get gas and adult adult adult. He saw this and asked me if I was okay. I told him that Miss Serina (that's what my students called me) was just really stressed about stuff I had to do later. Cole looked at me and said, "That's later. This is now. Have fun now!" It made me think...I don't have enough fun in the moment. I don't use my imagination and my moments as wisely as I should. Cole became my pixie dust. He took me out of myself and made me realize that anything was possible if I just lived now. And you know what? I didn't think about "gross grown up stuff" the rest of the day. Yes, the grown up stuff will still be there. Externally. But internally, we need to learn to not grow up. Not completely anyway. I hope I never lose the need for adventure, and that I can use my imagination to land on clock towers or fight pirates or be whoever I want to be. I hope I can still be carefree and live in the moment. I may have to become an adult, but I don't have to adhere to the rules of what it should be like. I have Peter Pan syndrome. I hope I never grow up. And I want to fly and never ever land.